I sometimes used to say that I would not mind having Christmas on my own. I was in the middle of a mild tug of love at the time, between my partner and my children and ex and felt that I would not mind being shot of the whole occasion. That happened this year, by accident not by design, and I have had the chance to reflect on it now. My children were both away with their wife or boyfriend's families and my partner was working so I was on my own for Christmas this year.
A lady bishop Sarah Mulally conducted the service
Last year I worked over Christmas and I worked on Christmas Eve was well. They did not want me on Christmas Day itself this time, so I stayed in my house in London. Everything closes down over Christmas in the Uk and I there are no buses or rube trains. I decided, however er, to go to church and so walked to Saint Paul's Cathedral and back which takes the best part of two hours each way - although I do not walk as well as I used to and gt a taxi for the final part of each trip.
It was a lovely service at St Paul's led by the lady bishop Sarah Mulally with a sermon by the (male) dean. Any temptation I may have had to convert to Catholicism would be stymied by the thought that they refuse to countenance any woman fulfilling the job of priest. The service was attended by lots of people and they made a point of welcoming those 'of all faiths and none', as the phrase nowadays has it. You can be pious or just curious and you will be welcomed there.
I would not count myself among the pious but I was a little more than curious. I self-define as a Christian but I find it very hard to believe in an afterlife - it would be a little dull apart from anything else, being stuck in Heaven for perpetuity with no physical pleasures to enjoy - yet Christianity seems a g good way to lead your life and it has stood the test of time, so I accept it even if I do not fully embrace every aspect of its theology. I take it seriously - but not literally.
After the service I walked back to Brixton. My partner said I should have driven but I needed the walk and I was not certain of finding a place to park even on Christmas Day. The police might have given me a ticket even if the traffic wardens were off duty and I did not want to risk it so a walk seemed the best option. I certainly had time to kill. After that found a Pret A Manger that was open in Brixton and had a solitary meal before watching Doctor Who (excellent by the way).
It was a fairly uneventful day than, with telephone calls to my children and partner and a zoom with my brothers so I was not entirely isolated. My solo Christmas was an interesting experiment but not one I would necessarily want to repeat very often. It made me realise that human beings are essentially social creatures who need a degree of human contact. Christmas can be a time when those who are on their own are isolated and, therefore, most likely to feel lonely.
Edwin Lerner
My other blog is diaryofatouristguide.blogspot.com
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